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The world is stranger than you think - Off in the distance
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May 2016
 

The Bellinghman
Date: 2006-01-17 15:50
Subject: The world is stranger than you think
Security: Public
A woman has had a hitman jailed. No, not for killing someone. For not killing someone, despite the fact that she paid him multiple times.

Kent Online article (no sub):

After they had both left hospital, Mrs Ryder contacted him and repeated her request. Reeves said a friend would do the job but the price was now £5,000.

Mrs Ryder gave Reeves a cheque for the amount and it was paid into his account. He told her she would be killed in a drive-by shooting on June 11 2003. But shortly before, he telephoned her and cancelled it.

"He later said he had to kill the hitman and the money had gone to his widow," said the prosecutor. "Mrs Ryder was desperate to end her life, so she asked Mr Reeves if he himself would kill her.

I boggle slightly. No, I boggle a lot. There must be cheaper ways to commit suicide. And "I'm sorry, but my sub-contractor had to be terminated" will never sound quite the same again.
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User: pir
Date: 2006-01-17 12:55 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Oddly for me, that's where my mother grew up.
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The Bellinghman
User: bellinghman
Date: 2006-01-17 13:11 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Ah, yes. There should be an entry in "The Meaning of Liffe' for that — the strange emotion that occurs when you know the location of, or participants in, a bizarre news story.
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Tony Finch: silly
User: fanf
Date: 2006-01-17 13:37 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Keyword:silly
Shouldn't she be done for conspiracy to commit murder?
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The Bellinghman
User: bellinghman
Date: 2006-01-17 13:41 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
It's an interesting question.

major_clanger?
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La Renarde
User: renarde
Date: 2006-01-17 16:09 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
There must be cheaper ways to commit suicide.

Oh yes; but the trouble is, you've got to find a way that'll reliably finish you off, and that's easier said than done. If you already want to die, the very last thing you need is to regain consciousness having been severely injured during a failed attempt. So having someone else who is committed to making sure you're very very dead could be well worth the money.

What a bizarre story.
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